Attempting to makes sense out of my emotions can be a huge conundrum for me especially when I am dealing with the female of the species. They continue to be the most perplexing mind bending creatures that cross my visceral threshold. No matter how intelligent I fashion myself to be the other gender has me painting myself into the corner where the paint never seems to dry.
Eventually like all things the upset passes into the deep dark night but so many things remain hanging in the balance. I am forced to retreat into the safety zone of those things I know best isolation, my writing and of course spin class. Maybe I am just not cut out for relationships even though I have always wanted one with a woman that truly understood me as I have tried to understand them. I must shoulder the complete responsibility because my sober life now 24 plus years now will not allow myself to blame anyone but yours truly.
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