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Wednesday, July 3, 2013

How Can I Be Sure?


How do I tell someone that I care for that they have gone wrong? How do I have the right to make assessments about them and not appear to be in any way judgmental? One way to assure this doesn’t happen is by making sure that I am not trying to feel superior to them when I make those observations. That is I have no agenda other than their well-being. It is unavoidable that judgment of any kind can get me into trouble lest I be judged myself but to sit idly by when there is a chance by an intervention that I can help would be a greater disservice and I would be misrepresenting myself as a caring man if I sit on the sidelines and do nothing when by taking action I felt I might be of some help. 

In order to bolster the idea that I should do or say something would be to check the veracity of my judgments by sharing with another whom I respect and value that their responses will not result in hyperbole and exaggerate an already tenuous situation.   Although that can be a slippery slope because when trying to verify my thoughts I must take an inordinate amount of care that I do not appear to be a gossip. So often we as humans can engage in schadenfreude in trying to feel superior but we must trust those we impart our confidences to that they keep our words in confidence and be an active listener to what their thoughts are on the subject in order to keep our own judgments in perspective. 



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